Forest of the Jade Lynx

April 17th, 2009

Ambiguity

4/17/09 09:25 pm

Okay, so if you haven't seen Dr. Horrible's Sing-A-Long Blog, then stop what you are doing and watch it. It factors into most of this post.

I was listening to the soundtrack tonight, as I do frequently lately, and I started wondering why I like it so much. Or most of Joss Whedon's stuff, for that matter. (I can't say "all" anymore, not feeling Dollhouse just yet. That may change. Buffy wasn't so hot it's first season.) I realized it's because his stuff is rife with characters battling with ambiguity in their lives, particularly morally.

Angel - vampire with a soul. He's a good guy... sort of. He's also a vampire, which makes him a bloodsucking fiend. And geez, the whole final season was one huge moral ambiguity.

Dr Horrible - Evil Genius that simply wants to change the world and isn't keen on the idea of murdering to accomplish the goal. He wants to see change in the world and the only way he can see that happening is if he rules it. And he passionately loves a girl who also wants to make the world better, she's just doing it the way that is morally acceptable.

The question of ends justifying the means comes up when I discuss Watchmen with (intelligent) people that have seen/read it. I love the discussion and I usually take the side of the justification, mostly because it really gets people's hackles up. But it's also just a discussion that I can't seem to resolve in my mind. I prefer to actually err on the side of ends not justifying the means, but there are times when I still wonder. If Dr Horrible really did rule the world and in the end the "symptom" of homelessness was solved, would that be a bad thing?

Loss of freedom in exchange for near utopia? But in the end, how much freedom do we really have that we'd lose under a supreme dictator?

Okay, I've thrown out some purposely vague points. Discuss!!

Tell Me About It

July 3rd, 2008

Rumors of my demise are greatly exaggerated...

7/3/08 08:57 am

...though the rumors of my internet connection's demise aren't.

Let's see how well I can update on my life without posting an entire book.

Since I last posted... I have moved out of my parents' house and into my own apartment. It's a little 2 bedroom, so the kids have to share a room, but it's cozy and no one has really complained yet. Cable, phone, etc is much too much expensive so my only connection to the outside world is my cell phone and what time I can squeeze in at work. (Like now while I should probably be doing other things but have opted to enjoy the last day before the 4th in relative ease and tranquility.)

I lost my job with ACS back in January. My boss and I just butted heads one too many times and she decided not to renew my contract with them. All the better for me, because it led to my getting my current job. I am working for a foreclosure law firm as a Lobby Ambassador (okay, so my real title is Receptionist, but we do so much more than just sit and answer phones that I refuse to accept that title.) If you keep up with real estate events, you'd probably know that Florida is one of the biggest states for foreclosures and I work for one of the largest firms in the state. It's not a pleasant business, but the owner of the company is very committed to his employees so he does what he can to make our working environment as pleasant as is possible. It's a great job.

My social life is fairly simple, though leaps and bounds beyond what it was a year ago. I have two really close friends, Ryan and Sarah, who keep me sane and occasionally actually drive me to insanity, but then drag me back again. We spend a lot of time together, which is exactly what I needed. No "men" on the social front, but that's not a bad thing. (Have to put men in quotes because while Ryan is very much a man, he doesn't count towards that particular scenario :D )

I'm amazed that it is already July. I'm three short months away from being relatively on my own for a year. I look back at where I was in September of last year and realize that while things are far from perfect, they are so much better than I could have imagined. I don't see unadulterated happiness on a regular basis, but I'm not miserable like I was before. I'm finding a really good balance in my head, and working my way to being the woman I was meant to be and that's a good good thing.

Current Location: Work

December 8th, 2007

I live!

12/8/07 11:32 pm

Okay, so it's been way the heck too long since I updated.

I got a small package in the mail yesterday (thanks Melissa!!) and it reminded me that I haven't done any updating in quite a long time. So here I am.

Some basics:

Still living with my parents. There is nothing quite being a 31 year old trying to live with her parents. I am actively seeking another residence. I love my parents. I want to continue to love my parents... so I'm trying to move out of their house.

I'm currently working for American Cancer Society. That requires two things... first that I have much patience because my boss requires a lot of it. And secondly that I not smoke. Do you know how hard it is to have one without the other? Yeah. Working for ACS may be healthier for my body, but my mind, she may explode.

I got a car. It's a '07 Nissan Versa. Yatta!

Here is a picture of me (taken tonight):

As you can see, my hair has grown in rather nicely. I'm pleased.

All in all life sucks, but it's on an upswing.

September 14th, 2007

Hello to all my fans!

9/14/07 02:30 am

I am not dead. I HAVE been living basically in my bed and hadn't felt much like blogging, or reading blogs, but I got a nudge so I figured I'd stop in.

I decided to do something fun. I posted weight and measurements on April 19, 2007, so I'm gonna repost those figures and then put my current figures next to it. So exciting!

My Weight Results!

April 19 Results September 13 Results

Neck measurements:                                                 14.0"                                                      13.75"

Chest Measurements:                                                42.5"                                                      41.5"

Arm Measurements:                                                   15.75"                                                    14.5"

Stomach Measurements:                                          39.25"                                                 37.75"

Hip Measurements:                                                    43.75"                                                   41"

Thigh Measurements:                                                25.5"                                                      23.25"

      Weight:                                                                   198.0 lbs.                                                173.3 lbs.

August 9th, 2007

Update

8/9/07 10:18 pm

Nothing much to report. I moved my computer to my bedroom today, so perhaps I'll post more now that I can do it lying down. We'll see...

I'm alive, barely. I'm currently under the care of a pain management clinic who has me on a new cocktail of meds (I kid you not, 6 prescriptions and one over the counter). I've been seeing a psychologist and am moving on to a psychiatrist because apparently I'm clinically depressed. (They want me on meds, so that'll make a seventh prescription to add to the mix.) My life essentially feels like it's coming apart at the seams, and some days that makes me feel awful and some days it gives me hope that what I'll find underneath is better.

I have steroid injections on the 25th and then another procedure to attempt to shrink the disk on September 13th. We'll see how it goes.

July 12th, 2007

Fun!

7/12/07 09:19 am

I like this one. A lot.

On Wikipedia, enter your birth month and day only, and it gives you lists of important things that day signifies. Find three events in history, two birthdays, and one holiday celebrated on your birthday.

My birthday being August 24, surprisingly it's a tremendously interesting date. Was hard to pare down the events to three.

79 - Mount Vesuvius erupts. The cities of Pompeii, Herculaneum, and Stabiae are buried in volcanic ash.
1853 - Potato chips are first prepared.
1891 - Thomas Edison patents the motion picture camera.

Birthdays. SO awesome to discover you share something in common with one of your favorite authors. :D

1929 - Yasser Arafat, Palestinian leader (d. 2004)
1951 - Orson Scott Card, American writer

Holidays. There are a handful, but I like the celebration of freedoms, so that's why I picked it. :D

Ukraine: National Holiday, independence from the Soviet Union (1991).

A call for brutal honesty

7/12/07 09:00 am

Recently I was presented a concept that somewhat confused me. And let me preface this by saying that I have the worst self view of myself ever. But I know enough to know that oftentimes our own self views are much worse than what other people see, so I've always clung to the idea that I am prettier than I appear to be in the mirror.

I was told, though, that I am a very attractive person, because my "wonderful personality" shines through an otherwise unattractive person. I was also told that this information had been confirmed to the teller by other people.

So here is where the brutal honesty comes in. Because I really need to understand the comment in order to know fully how to proceed in my dealings with said person.

If you have only seen pictures of me, much as I value all of my loving readers' opinions, your opinion can't help here. (I was also told that some of the pictures I have posted are "the absolute best" I've ever looked and therefore they don't count towards the view of my general appearance.) I need honesty from people who have actually seen me. I'm torn on those of you who have seen the Help Me Veronica videos. I think having my head buzzed wouldn't qualify as one of my best physical appearance moments, but...it's still possible to say that I only allowed the best part to be shown. (It's not true, but it's still an argument that could be made.)

So please. If you have met me, give me your unfettered opinions. If you have only seen the Help Me Veronica videos, then give me your opinion, but please note that's the only way you've seen me. And please feel free to post anonymously. I want real opinions and I want all of them, and if you are afraid you will hurt my feelings, then I'd rather you be comfortable in me not knowing who you are than to not get the opinion.

Oh and Steve, your opinion doesn't weigh heavily, you are MUCH too biased here. :D

Current Mood: Stressed

July 7th, 2007

"When You Say You Love Me"

7/7/07 02:43 am

Given how many versions in tribute to Josh Groban there is, it's probably insane that I just discovered this song. But it's been on repeat on my playlist all night. ::purrs::

( Read more... )

Current Mood: romantic

July 3rd, 2007

Ft. DeSoto

7/3/07 10:45 pm

What's the plans? Anyone?

Tell Me About It

May 28th, 2007

Update (Now With More Pictures!)

5/28/07 05:59 pm

I know I haven't updated in forever (save that quick little post about Mia and the flour). I haven't been reading journals either. Sorry. :( It's just one of those... lives.

Anyhow, it's not much, but Mia and I snapped some pictures today so I thought I'd put them up.

We had a Mommy/Mia makeup day. I had purchased her a new makeup kit and Jacqui had sent me a little sample pack of new shadows and blusher and lipstick, so I thought I'd give those a try and let Mia play while I did.

( Pictures! )

Current Music: Azure Ray

May 21st, 2007

What happens...

5/21/07 10:26 am

( ... when Mommy PvPs on a Monday morning? )

May 6th, 2007

Bruised Arm, Bruised Ego

5/6/07 07:19 pm

I haven't updated about my health in a while and pretty much it's cause I'm SO sick of griping.

So after the fiasco with the Orthopedic Surgeon... I returned to the doctor that has been doing the corticosteroid injections. I didn't have to say a word. He read over the report the surgeon presented and, in nicer terms, said he was off his rocker. Apparently the surgeon said in his report that there hasn't been enough change in my films since the last surgery. Only, there is this whole new disc pushing on nerves! Dr. Jackson, the steroid doc, is convinced that the orthopedic surgeon is wrong and so he's sending me to see a neurosurgeon.

Before that happens, he's sending me for a new MRI (the old one is a year old) and a test called a nerve conduction study. Basically they are gonna jab my leg with needles and shock me and see how my nerves react. Yeeeay.

( I had the MRI on Friday. )

May 1st, 2007

Written Word/ Art Contests

5/1/07 10:40 am

I'm going to be participating in an art contest and I noticed that they have a writing contest in conjunction. I know a handful of writers are on my F-list, so I figured I'd provide the link:

http://siberlee-mernac.blogspot.com/2007/04/written-word-blogging-contest.html

Tell Me About It

April 30th, 2007

Two Things

4/30/07 10:45 pm

First of all... Jody. I'm just an idiot. I put it in the corner when it arrived and then forgot about it entirely. The issue has been resolved and I'm gonna look through the box tomorrow. :)

Secondly, does anyone have any advice to offer on sedating dogs? I really need to give the dog a buzz cut (for everyone's sakes) but he's scared of the clippers. I'm thinking if I give him a mild sedative, it might calm him enough to allow me to relieve him of his fur burden. Thoughts?

April 25th, 2007

Wendy's and Violent Femmes

4/25/07 12:48 pm

Is it disturbing to anyone else that Blister In the Sun is the new background music for Wendy's commercials?

Dryer Woes

4/25/07 12:57 am

I have to buy a dryer. My dryer died. It died a long, drawn out, clothes ruining death.

Anyone have a dryer they adore that they'd like to tell me about?

April 24th, 2007

Convention Outfit

4/24/07 03:26 pm

Mom is considering borrowing my dress and asked for pics of it. So I figured I'd just go ahead and make a post about it. As always, click the pics to see larger versions.

April 19th, 2007

Weight and Measurements

4/19/07 09:54 am

This is the one that is really hard to post, cause this is the one that follows on the heels of a week where I just plain ole didn't pay attention to my food intake and I had no exercise.

I'm a few days late in all this, so next week will be even more disappointing because it will be just a couple of days following this one.

On the brightside, I did lose some size in my neck, chest and arms. I went up in weight, stomach, hips and thighs though. Erk.

( TMI Warning )

Back to routine starting today. More water, fewer sodas, lots of exercise.

April 17th, 2007

Arg!

4/17/07 10:20 am

Doing the "I have the envelope that the W2 came in, but where the heck is the actual W2?!" dance.

April 16th, 2007

Thank yous

4/16/07 12:14 am

I hope everyone can just be understanding in this sort of blanket thank you. I fear that if I try to hard to respond to each and everyone of you individually, I might implode with the repetitiveness.

You guy cannot begin to fathom what it means to me to see people caring. I'm sort of struggling. Muddling along trying to make sure that I do the things a person is supposed to do. It's exceptionally odd to me that I can have a real conversation with my mother, but somehow I keep having to remind myself to take trips the bathroom. Or that in order to get home, I have to actually stand up and leave the place I'm in.

For those of you who are new "friends"... I don't believe in the status of my friendship being dependent on time served. If you wanna be around me, then you are my friend and your thoughts are just as important to me as everyone else's. So thank you for being here, make yourself at home

Jody. I think your icon in your response to my post may have been the biggest help I've had yet. Oddly. It made me feel at home, which I haven't felt all day, even when I was in my actual home. (Geez, how bad of a tv addict am I?)

I sat with Mom at the flea market today. She needed to work in order to be able to cover the rent of the booth so they didn't lose it. We were shockingly blessed with a woman who came along and casually bought 24 1lb. jars of honey. Like she was picking up a jar for her table. $120 worth of honey (well, $144 worth of honey, but Mom gave her a discount for the mass purchase) and her only concern about it was "Hm, should I buy a box of 24 bears, too?" She did decide that she'd send her husband back to get the bears at a later time. Insane. The profit on it covered the rent.

And now my poor Sniffy is begging to be let outside, so I shall close.